i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I wish life had little blips of pornography
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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