Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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