just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
