I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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