check it out our google latitudes are spooning
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
