Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
