So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
3 2 1 whiskey
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
