You don't have asthma, your pregnant
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
