Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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