So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
