Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
That's intense
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
There was a lot of him and a little penis
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
