taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
