i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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