used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize