I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Randomize
