i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
