I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize