just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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