that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
