no one should ever give us hovercrafts
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
