note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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