There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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