This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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