So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
