mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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