God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
