If that was your dad, he is hot
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
