Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
