My girlfriend figured out who you are.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
