I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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