All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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