I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize