White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Randomize