i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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