I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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