After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Randomize
