Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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