haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Randomize