Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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