now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
even my farts smell like vagina
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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