we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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