Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
