Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Randomize
