Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
