Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
