We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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