I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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