The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
