watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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