So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize