So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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