Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
