Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
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