he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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